MY REGRET !!!!

Daddy’s life had taken a drastic change lately.........

Daddy is very sad to inform that daddy will not get to see much of Keith boy anymore. All can be said is, mommy had remained the same person, the reason daddy chose to leave your side.......... again!!!!! YES, AGAIN!!!!!! DADDY CHOSE TO LEAVE.....

Daddy’s guilt is Keith boy is the one being affected by our adult problem. Daddy’s heart is indeed very heavy when daddy saw Keith boy. Keith boy kept holding onto daddy’s hand, and pulling daddy to go with Keith boy, as things were before. Sadly, it is not……. I am really sorry to my precious beloved boy.

Keith, Daddy is really sorry that daddy cannot be there to accompany Keith boy to play or to go window shopping as we have before.

The court order that was finalized had ordered, actually that condition was what your mommy had demanded for our divorce, that for daddy to only see Keith boy fortnightly at a specific day and specific time only, your mommy or a representative has to be present, mind you this condition also applies to Ah Ku or Grandma, as per requested by your mommy although not stated in the decree.

Daddy hopes that Keith boy will not see that your Daddy as bad-mouthing mommy. Daddy does hope that Keith boy is going to be raised up well and mommy will see the light of the need for both of us to see each other.

As money had always been a concern and your daddy used to exist in this world only as a “money-making tool”, daddy has been busy with work and mommy had indeed made it very hard for daddy to see Keith boy.

Daddy had always loved Keith boy and will always do. Please understand that daddy had never intended to abandon Keith boy in anyway. Daddy is very sorry that daddy and mommy's problem had caused Keith boy not to have a normal family. Daddy had tried very hard to make good of the whole situation but always ends up with the same result and problems.

If Keith boy ever needed anything, just give daddy a call. For now, daddy will just have to bear with the pain, living without seeing Keith, until Keith is much older and can decide for ownself, because of a very selfish act.

Now daddy just hopes that there won’t be any mind poisoning, happening to Keith boy. Daddy does agree that daddy’s decision to move on with daddy’s life has indeed affected Keith boy’s life. But Daddy do hope that Keith boy would realise that we each are given a choice and we decide it all on what our heart tells us to. When love is dead, please understand that the heart is not once broken (a single crack), it is already in pieces.

This blog is daddy’s only way of letting Keith boy to find out daddy’s part of the truth. Daddy will leave it to Keith boy to find the truth for own self.

Two Month Old

On Tuesday, we have went to TDMC to have your second month dose. It was Dr Eric Lee whom gave you your jab today. What really surprised mum and me was that you stopped crying as we used the rattle again. But you did whimper quite a bit that day. But you did cry a bit later on at home. I guess the jab could have hurt you quite a bit. I did took the video and you would probably wonder why your dad was recording it instead of cuddling you, well I did carry you as soon as I off the camera. In fact that is your longest cry because your cries had never lasted more than 2 minutes, even during birth you hardly cry until the nurse have to hit you on your footsole. I wonder why mummy and grandma keep slapping you on your butt when that is the place that would hurt most after the jab. And it really breaks our heart to see you cry like the way you did in the video.



In fact you were very calm again after that (during our outing) I was afraid of taking you on our outing because I feared that you would feel uneasy. But look at how 'kay poh' you were on your surroundings.



Things I observed about you in this two months:
You are now much more patient taking your milk and you like to doze off while taking it.
You are now able to follow moving objects with your eyes and head too.
You sleeps better on the rocking cradle (Luckily there is a thing called an automatic rocker) And you have abandoned your baby cot.
You like to stretch a lot. So much that it looks like you are trying to wriggle out of your pillow.
You like BM more and are much more fussy with formula.
Your cries are for milk and whines are either for milk, diaper change or sleep.
You dislike the maid, even won't take your milk when Aunty Priscilla tried to feed you

Your Vital-Stats:
Weight: 5.1kg
Height: 58cm
Head Circumference: 38cm

One Month Old

Well, Boy you are one month old today but on the lunar calender it is tomorrow that is the Chinese full month (I dunno why they call it full-moon?????)

I have taken care of you till 5am this morning. I guessed your mummy was tire-out by your whining/struggling throughout the night. She waited so anxiously for midnight (she kept calling me to see if I can leave early), as soon as I returned home from work, she ordered me to clean up. After my meal she passed you to me for care and she jumped straight into bed. I really felt guilty that I have made the two of you suffered......

Things that I have observed about you
You like to take a lot more milk at midnight (it is possible, because in our line of work, your mum and I always took our dinner at midnight, even during pregnancy) And also you have a habit that you will want at least 1/2 oz Enfa (as a finishing bottle, is that a dessert for you?) before you retire to sleep :P

You would start by letting out more than regular 'small and short cries/moans' when you are about to want your milk...... By the time you really cry out and if the milk took too long, you would throw tantrum and would not wanna drink, sometimes you even use your hands to push the bottle away or swing your head away from it.

When you sleep you tend to make small noises as well as many facial expressions too (My mum told me that you are playing with the flower kids 'fa cai' 花子 where you would cry when you lose and smile when you win.

You like your "Guiness Stout" bath (you seem soothed by it) but you really dislike plain water bath and the "herbal bath for jaundice" given by your Aunt May

You disliked drinking plain water and taking Chinese Medicine (like Bo Ying Pills)

You are normally calm when we put you down as to preparing to change your diapers. But you would always throw a fuss when we start to change your shirt.

You are always able to break free of your bind, unless grandma uses the elastic band on you.

Your mum always freaks out when she hears you cry. She seemed to be pressured and lost whenever it happened. (Probably the reason why she was hospitalised)

You like to sleep in the living room more than in our room. You would prefer a big oversized pillow over your own cot. You would also not mind the noises we make when you are sleeping in the living room but are rather fussy of even soft whispers in the room, unless you are really deep asleep.

You hated heat and would sweat very easily.

Grandma have started the tummy oil rubbing and seems like it is wearing off some of the colic effect you are having.

More pictures of you






Are you trying to tell me not to take your pictures?


Now whom do you look like more?


Your Vital-Stats:
Weight: 4.45kg
Height: 55cm
Head Circumference: 37cm